It’s not just you.

It was 9 in the morning… 

Me and my son went out to have his blood checked, the nurse told us to come back after an hour so we went to have breakfast first.. It was still early and there are only few people dining in. I ordered a meal and a coffee. I badly needed caffeine because I haven’t slept much. My son keep on waking up because his fever run high last night.

My son already saved us a table upstairs. There were 4 to 5 people up there. There were some students, parents who pick up their kids and then there’s us. All I want is to have coffee and have a peaceful morning, but my extroverted son is extra friendly today. He’s saying hi to strangers and keep on asking them silly questions. I just sit there and observe. Strangers seem to be friendly with him as well. And I wonder if the world is this kind to him, I have nothing to worry about. whenever we go out I always feel anxious and I care a lot about what people thinks about my son. He’s not clinically diagnosed but I know there’s something about him. Moms know. I know it by heart. 

As I observed other parents with their kids, I have noticed one thing. Most parents have it tough. We all have this silent battles aside from being a parent. And parenthood alone, is tough.

There’s two boys playing with my son. Both of them share the same hair, it was shoulder length. The father of the other boy approached the other parent.

“They both have long hair, are you having a hard time convincing your son to have a haircut, too?” 

That’s when it hits me. I am not the only one who experience challenges on parenting like hair cut, school schedules, meal plans, etc. Most of the time I feel like I’m a bad mom for letting my son’s hair grew long, letting him eat snacks before meal time, letting him skip a school day and so on.

I remember when my son turned 2. We decided to have his hair cut and he wouldn’t budge. He doesn’t like his hair to be touch or cut. I know he have this sensory issues. We’re lucky enough to have him understand that his hair needed to be cut some time especially before the school starts. But of course, it’s not like this everyday.

As a parent, I realized that I have to be more patient and kind not only with my kid but also with myself. There are no perfect parents, and there are no perfect children but there are plenty of perfect moments along the way. 

All we need is to support each other and our own ways of parenting. 

“When given the choice between being right and being kind, choose kind.” —R.J. Palacio, Wonder.